July 30, 2015

One thing I learned today: Things need to be finely tuned. Seems a little disorganization, dietary digression & mental obsession can alter the course fairly quickly. A little nervous for what's to come.

One thing I'm grateful for: An excellent patient experience at UVM Medical Center!

July 29, 2015

One thing I learned today: Demons follow you wherever you go.

One thing I'm grateful for: A beautiful Vermont day complete with some beach time & a meditation group.

July 28, 2015

One thing I learned today: You can be homesick for a place you didn't love.

One thing I'm grateful for: A lot of texts from my people.  

July 27, 2015

One thing I learned today: I sleep like a baby in Vermont. (Well, knock on wood - check back on that once school starts.)

One thing I'm grateful for: Sleep.

July 26, 2015

One thing I learned today: Moving takes a lot out of me. Patience is important right now.

One thing I'm grateful for: My new whip.

July 25, 2015

One thing I learned today: Vermont is as magical as ever. But I can't fuck with sleep.

One thing I'm grateful for: My new home.

July 24, 2015

One thing I learned today: Last days of work are super fun.

One thing I'm grateful for: That I got to spend a year and a half talking to the kindest, toughest, most caring person I've ever met, and that he told me it was gonna be ok. Thank you for taking care of me.

July 23, 2015

One thing I learned today: EAT BREAKFAST. Even if you are not hungry from working out.

One thing I'm grateful for: A fellow sugar-fighter. 

July 22, 2015

One thing I learned today: It's ok that my jab is a little weak.

One thing I'm grateful for: Sobriety.

July 21, 2015

One thing I learned today: Working out for 2 hours is almost twice as hard as 1.

One thing I'm grateful for: My favorite doctor.

July 20, 2015

One thing I learned today: Need to fine tune.

One thing I'm grateful for: Workouts.

July 19, 2015

One thing I learned today: Still a carb addict. -__-

One thing I'm grateful for: When my friends try to keep me in line, even if I'm annoyed about it in the moment.

July 18, 2015

One thing I learned today: I NEVER regret showing up to the gym.

One thing I'm grateful for: Soulmate friends.

July 17, 2015

One thing I learned today: Get back to the die-hard workout mentality. It's worth it.

One thing I'm grateful for: The past year. It was the absolute worst, in the absolute very best ways.

July 16, 2015

One thing I learned today: People who judge others who choose to abstain from certain types of foods are assholes. People who judge others' diets in general are assholes. Food is fuel. Food is medicine. Food should not be fetishized.

One thing I'm grateful for: Those who actually understand nutritional science. And who respect others' choices in regard to their own health.

July 15, 2015

One thing I learned today: Exceptions are not worth it. Ever.

One thing I'm grateful for: Boxing. Discipline. Ink. Sweat. Baby Foot.

July 14, 2015

One thing I learned today: People who are judgmental about the way other people eat SUCK.

One thing I'm grateful for: Inspiration to give up sugar.

July 13, 2015

One thing I learned today: Routine is good.

One thing I'm grateful for: People who get me.

July 12, 2015

One thing I learned today: Banter is important.

One thing I'm grateful for: My male twin.

July 11, 2015

One thing I learned today: All-you-can-eat is not for me.

One thing I'm grateful for: My friends.

July 10, 2015

One thing I learned today: Don't ever stop boxing. Or working out in general. Biggest mistake I've made in the last few years.

One thing I'm grateful for: New threads, new boots, new tunes.

July 9, 2015

One thing I learned: Phone needs to be on airplane more. Also noises while I'm trying to sleep are in my top 5 irritants. -____-

One thing I'm grateful for: bpconnect

July 8, 2015

One thing I learned today: Don't stop boxing.

One thing I'm grateful for: Routine.

July 7, 2015

One thing I learned today: Just do the next best thing.

One thing I'm grateful for: Li2CO3

July 6, 2015

One thing I learned today: I want my self-sufficiency back.

One thing I'm grateful for: Sources of inspiration.

The song "Lifted Up" by Passion Pit.

Looking at my old journals, and instead of lamenting that I've been trying over and over to get it right for over 5 years now, realizing that it's actually amazing I haven't given up.

Being out and about at 6am on the quiet streets, knowing the whole day is stretched before me with possibility.

My best friend, who accepts her flaws with humility and genuinely works to grow - she inspires me to do the same.

My boss, who when rounding on patients doesn't stand at the foot of their bed like the other doctors, but crouches next to them, holding their hands.

My patients, who stay clean or try time and time again to do so despite all odds. 

The life story of Abraham Lincoln, who battled severe depression. 

The hospital bracelets hanging on my wall from the last time I drank and my first psych hospitalization. They serve as reminders not to tread backwards, but also of how far I've come. 

All of you.

July 5, 2015

One thing I learned today: "No one is responsible for your own self-care but you."

One thing I'm grateful for: The will to try harder. A kick in the pants.

July 4, 2015

One thing I learned today: WJEFOWIJfiejaf;oiw. Sleep hygiene! Back to basics again.

One thing I'm grateful for: Three days clean.

July 3, 2015

One thing I learned today: Med are not optional, unfortunately.

One thing I'm grateful for: Digging out today.

July 2, 2015

One thing I learned today: People care.

One thing I'm grateful for: A comical reminder in the form of a dream.

July 1, 2015

One thing I learned today: We are all connected.

One thing I'm grateful for: A great friend.

June 30, 2015

One thing I learned today: It's SO much easier to regress than move forward. Quite unfair.

One thing I'm grateful for: Confessing.

June 29, 2015

One thing I learned today: There's no room for error. I can't do this with sleep. I can't drink caffeine. I can't mess with diet. I need to STOP.

One thing I'm grateful for: A cocoon, even though I shouldn't be in it.

June 28, 2015

One thing I learned today: Holy crap sleep is important. I've lost any desire to do overnights.

One thing I'm grateful for: The amazing people I met last night.